In particular, I've been thinking about how I'm the same age as Sushi Man, who was a character that I drew a lot in middle school. In an unprecedentedly cynical move I set the bar so low in describing the harsh and often awkward realities of J.C. Sushi's mid twenties that I figured comparing myself to him would probably just wind up making myself feel way, way, way better about where I stand in life right now.
So I did the only thing that seemed appropriate and pumped out some visuals:
I also really ought to stop thinking too hard about the exact mechanics of that relationship with Mrs. Butterworth.
You know what? Even though I am unquestionably more prepared to deal with the real world than Sushi Man would have been if he hadn't been conveniently swept up into an alternate dimension so he could actually live out his superhero fantasies, I am approximately 62% creeped out by the amount of similarities there are between the two of us. With that in mind I can only hope that turning twenty-nine and a half is nowhere near the acid trip I expected that to be when I was thirteen...
Actually, I hear this is a pretty average reaction to realizing you're
about to hit 30. If anyone's put up with my shenanigans long enough to know who this
crackpot is, you get somewhere in the realm of four million bonus points.
So yeah. Final verdict, Zelda Vinciguerra officially beat Sushi Man at life, and I probably just slid down a few points on that scale for talking about myself in the third person. I'm still beating Sushi Man, though, and that feels pretty awesome.